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Download AlchemistCookbook2.ipt
The Alchemist's Cookbook v2
Complex Recipes, Ruminations, and Potions

This material is Open Game Content, and is licensed for public use under the terms of the Open Game License v1.0a.

Ingredients
  • 1/9 fluid ounce Saggak begonia
  • 1/9 tablespoon Tithanarnar cerium shards
  • 1 tablespoon chopped scapolite
  • 19 pints diced Goggi chicory
  • 1 teaspoon Flashrazius mermaid paste
  • 1 teaspoon Amdi tomato root
  • 1 fluid ounce dahlia
  • 19 pounds viola seeds
  • 1 teaspoon crushed salpiglossis
  • 23 teaspoons amphisbaena
  • 1/6 pound Yajacherofius poltergeist oil
  • 12 teaspoons partially hydrogenated Atsi milfoil
  • 1/3 pound sliced Vutkayefky eucalyptus
  • 1/7 gallon jasmine
  • 1/10 pint partially hydrogenated petunia paste
  • 1 tablespoon Ecacraclewar cockatrice dressing
  • 1/10 gallon Crea wyvern chunks
  • 1 fluid ounce calliopsis
  • 9 ounces stewed pansy root
  • 1/8 pint chopped dill
  • 21 quarts crushed asafetida
  • 6 cups Æraden crocus seeds
  • 5 tablespoons diced Milos chervil


  • Ointment Directions
    Grind all the ingredients with a mortar in a roasting pan and add to enough water to make a thick, but flowable mixture.
    Add the decoction to olive or other vegetable oil, and simmer until the water has completely evaporated.
    Add beeswax as needed to get a firm consistency.
    Place the firm mixture into a different roasting pan and melt the mixture by heating slowly, and stir until completely blended.

    Notes - Sorted by Age and Relevance*
    * Because of variations in test conditions, recorded studies may have yielded wildly varying results. Ultimately it is up to the GM to interpret these results.

    Personal treatises concluded that 1 in 56 people were cured of 10 or more of the following symptoms: aerophagiaphobia (fear of swallowing air), anthropophobia (fear of people), atrophy, climacophobia (fear of stairs), clinophobia (fear of beds), difficulty swallowing, difficulty swallowing, hydrophobia (fear of water), pedophobia (fear of young children), priapism, stroke. Do not use if you or a family member are pregnant, nursing, of childbearing age, have a history of or are at risk from cancer, cerebrospinal fever, pinkeye. If negative symptoms develop, see an alchemist immediately.

    Ophenagard's experiments showed that lawful neutral, chaotic evil, chaotic neutral and neutral evil aligned characters are at 69% more risk to any effects of this recipe.


    Independant laboratory observations have indicated Leprechaun's are at 57% more risk to the effects of this recipe.

    Independant laboratory studies have shown paladin's are at 71% more risk to any effects of this recipe.

    Grakriat, Skikretla, Skegi's record concluded that Griffin, Phoenix, Ghoul, Thunderbird, Hobgoblin, Kelpie, and Viper's have up to 14% immunity to 1/5 of the effects of this recipe.

    Málænirnil, Thriereth's cookbook showed that Human's are at 2% more risk to 1/9 of the effects of this recipe.

    Etdico's guides indicated that lawful evil, chaotic good, neutral good and true neutral aligned characters have a 69% immunity to the effects of this recipe.

    Oekance, Thralos, Paeopus's reports showed that lawful good aligned characters have a 19% immunity to 1/6 of the effects of this recipe.

    Croshrobrewius's guides concluded that the victim must make 7 successful Fortitude saving throws in a row to recover from any illnesses caused from this recipe.

    Independant laboratory experiments have concluded each time the victim takes 9 or more damage from this recipe, he must make another Fortitude save or all damage incurred is permanent.

    Malallan, Talinbrol, Sinindyn's observation showed that there is a 17% chance that character will become addicted or dependant to the recipe. Addiction will require 9+(Number of days addicted) successful Will savings rolls to cure.

    Arsos, Grytus, Lefgive's observation concluded that successful saves do not allow the character to recover. Only magical healing can save the character.

    Eprifevyedias's experiments indicated that 85% of people who used this recipe were cured of the following symptoms: aeroacrophobia (fear of open, high places), anal leakage, androphobia (fear of men), anthophobia (fear of flowers), arithmophobia (fear of numbers), atrophy, bedwetting, coughing, cysts, hemorrhoids, melophobia (fear of music), oenophobia (fear of wine), priapism, rosacea, sneezing, stroke, symbolophobia (fear of symbols, magic), upset stomach. Do not use if you or a family member are pregnant, nursing, of childbearing age, have a history of or are at risk from diverticulosis, meningitis, thrush. If negative symptoms develop, see a healer immediately.

    Bakhön's cookbook concluded that lawful good aligned characters are at 81% more risk to 1/2 of the effects of this recipe.

    Iteris, Sicprolle's observations indicated that Halfling, and Dwarf's have up to 94% immunity to the effects of this recipe.

    Personal tests have concluded that barbarian and fighter's are at 44% more risk to the effects of this recipe.

    Laboratory tests have concluded when damaged by this recipe, character must succeed on another saving throw or 5 points of damage is permanent drain instead.

    Ryanq'tyil's experiments concluded that 92% of people who used this recipe experienced 10 or more of the following symptoms: age reversal, agyrophobia (fear of crossing streets), anuptaphobia (fear of staying single), autophobia (fear of loneliness), autophobia (fear of loneliness), bad breath, carnophobia (fear of meat), chorophobia (fear of dancing), cramps, ecclesiophobia (fear of churches), ergophobia (fear of work), eunuchoidism, eunuchoidism, filth fever, hallucinations, hemorrhoids, mindfire, priapism, sneezing, vomiting. Do not use if you or a family member are pregnant, nursing, of childbearing age, have a history of or are at risk from cold and fever symptoms, dengue, leukemia. If negative symptoms develop, see a druid immediately.

    Sem, Shich's experiments showed that druid's have up to 40% immunity to any effects of this recipe.

    Personal test indicated that bard, druid, cleric and paladin's have up to 68% immunity to the effects of this recipe.

    Rhedrolygibes, Anphi, Ise's handbooks concluded that Pixie's have a 76% immunity to 1/4 of the effects of this recipe.

    Ticlafroliel's experiments indicated that Unicorn, Zombie, and Brown Bear's are at 69% more risk to 1/4 of the effects of this recipe.

    Meridriel, Silinril, Aerelion's grimoires showed that there is a 80% chance that additional servings will cure any negative symptoms by a factor of 3.

    Rinelarnar's observations concluded that 1 in 166 people experienced the following symptoms: angina, autophobia (fear of loneliness), basiphobia (fear of walking), bedwetting, carnophobia (fear of meat), cataplexy, chills, choking, coughing, cramps, dementia, height shrinkage of at least 1 inch, mummy rot, rosacea, vertigo, vestiphobia (fear of clothing), vomiting. Do not use if you or a family member are pregnant, nursing, of childbearing age, have a history of or are at risk from Addison's disease, arthritis, arthritis. If negative symptoms develop, see a sorcerer immediately.

    Tidike, Conia, Myydtis's experiments showed that Gnome's have a 9% immunity to 1/2 of the effects of this recipe.

    Ecrykiryofius's experiment concluded that Human, Elf, and Drow's are at 83% more risk to 1/2 of the effects of this recipe.

    Independant laboratory tests have indicated there is a 6% chance that the cook will obtain a magical immunity to 68% of the side-effects.

    Creque, Ukoyimaque's essay concluded that 1 in 234 people were cured of up to 10 of the following symptoms: aerophobia (fear of air, wind), albinism, anal leakage, aneurysm, anthropophobia (fear of people), bedwetting, cometophobia (fear of comets), coughing, dizziness, hallucinations, heart attack, menorrhagia, panphobia (fear of everything), priapism, rosacea, teratophobia (fear of monsters), vomiting, vomiting. Do not use if you or a family member are pregnant, nursing, of childbearing age, have a history of or are at risk from diptheria, heart attack, stroke. If negative symptoms persist, see a druid immediately.

    Grauimipi, Creprununc's treatises showed that when damaged by this recipe, character must succeed on another saving throw or 20 points of damage is permanent drain instead.

    Cumae, Lefthon's tomes concluded that 1 in 186 people experienced the following symptoms: abnormal shrinkage of current body parts, aneurysm, apnea, apnea, artificial insemination, autism, cainophobia (fear of newness, novelty), cataplexy, cathisophobia (fear of sitting), chorophobia (fear of dancing), climacophobia (fear of stairs), cysts, demon fever, freckles, freckles, hagiophobia (fear of holy things, saints), lachanophobia (fear of vegetables), paranoia, pedophobia (fear of young children), polyphobia (fear of many things), rosacea, warts, zits. Do not use if you or a family member are pregnant, nursing, of childbearing age, have a history of or are at risk from hookworm, lupus, neuropathy. If negative symptoms develop, see a witch immediately.

    Laboratory studies have concluded there is a 83% chance that the cook will obtain a natural immunity to 91% of the negative side-effects.

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